Kavyablogs

The mosquitoes have been buzzing all night. I tried swatting it away with my hands but it has been continuously buzzing for so long that now my hands are too tired to even try. I try to sleep but the itch in my leg and the constant pain in my lower stomach is sucking my life out of me. Period cramps are the worst thing to happen to a woman. Imagine the pain you feel when a truck drives over you or when 106 knives are stabbed on your stomach. Trust me when I say they are less painful than period cramps. I wish I were exaggerating but I'm not. “ ए माइली को बुबा सुन्नुस न |” This is probably the eighth time that I have called out and been ignored by my husband. I wanted to tell him how I have been burning up all night and how these mosquitoes are sucking not just my blood, but the entire life out of me. I wanted to tell him that I am lying on a puddle of my own blood. I wanted to tell him that this pain in my stomach will not go away unless I drink some hot water. I wanted ...

I bite my lips, I fumble with the hem of my shirt and I intertwine my left hand with my right hand, take a deep breath and try to act nonchalant, trying my best to keep my discomfort and anger at bay. He stares and stares and stares. He stares a little more and stares and stares a bit too much. Jenny nudges me saying, “Man I feel like he comes to college just to stare at you. Isn’t he a bit too creepy?” I sigh and reply with a hum and a nod of my head. After a few seconds I tell Jenny how awkward I feel around that creep, “I honestly feel like he is undressing me with his eyes. Oh how much I’d love to pierce those penetrating eyes with a goddamn fork.” Jenny bursts out with laughter and says “woah there tiger, stop with your violent thoughts. I mean I can’t say it’s his fault either. Like look at you babe.” And although I roll my eyes at my best friend’s cheesy compliment, I could still feel ‘his’ gaze at the side of my head and I was still having murderous thoughts. And a...

  “Anil. Anil Gauchan is his name. And he will take you to US after marriage. Isn’t that amazing?” Sanu heard her parents saying as she uncrossed her legs and looked up to see them smiling so wide as if they were advertising for a Colgate advertisement. Her parents had always been so keen on marrying her off, it sometimes made her wonder what the rush was for. But being the kind of daughter who always listened to her parents and obeyed them no matter what, she knew she could not say no this time either. Even if she was just about to turn 22 in a month. Even if she did not have a single clue about how the ‘Anil Gauchan’ guy looked. Even if her heart had so badly wanted to say no. Sanu and Anil were now happily married for 2 years. Looking back on her two years of fairytale like marriage, Sanu had started to feel like her parents had made the right decision for her. Anil had always been so caring and loving towards her. Although he had not taken her to US like her parents s...

It’s a cold and dull and dreary Monday evening and my heart hurts. It’s 5:38 pm and my heart just hurts. As I sit and watch her desperately trying to warm her hands by engulfing the warm cup of tea in her palms, my heart hurts. As I sit and watch her take super tiny bites of the choco pie that I gave her a few minutes back, my heart hurts. 22 year old Kanchi didi came to visit us today. She used to render her helping hands in our daily household chores before she got married away to a guy in Nuwakot. Her mom had tears in her eyes when she bid her daughter a good bye hoping and praying to the gods above for Kanchi’s better life in her husband’s house, hoping that she will no longer need to go to people’s houses to work. But as I saw her today, I realized that Kanchi didi’s mother’s prayers did not turn out very well. I realized that when I saw her sitting with bare curled up toes in this chilly weather. I realized that when I saw her sitting there showering us with a fake smile w...

And I took a long breath, feeling my chest contract as the air slowly entered my nose and relax as it slowly left my lips. As I released the air from my mouth, I could smell the eggs that I had this morning. Blame my mom for forcing me to eat eggs every morning even though I have always made it clear that eggs will one day be the bane of my existence. And by the way, I am not doing yoga, no. Sorry Ramdev baba lovers. I am just sitting in my terrace as always and no I didn’t break a sweat carrying that damn black chair like last time (stop wondering which black chair I am talking about because you’d know if you read my first blog). Anyways yeah I am in my terrace and I am hunched up in front of my laptop for the past 23.4 minutes, playing with my hair and itching the allergic rash on my left cheek that literally appeared out of nowhere. And every 3.6 minutes I wonder if my cerebrum is working properly or not since I cannot really think about what to write. I mean as soon as my fin...

Dear soul sister, What does Chemistry remind me of? It reminds me of the very beginning of this very beautiful friendship. A friendship so pure that even distilled water gets jealous, a friendship that everyone wishes to have. Out of all the 30 something students in our class, you and I were the only ones to hate Chemistry with a passion which made us the only ones lingering around in the library when everyone was busy frying their brains on their Chemistry books. Then started our library shenanigans of course, which is clearly still etched onto my mind. From reading each other’s horoscopes to blushing over questions on ask.fm, from spitting water while trying to ‘act normal’ to reading psychology books, from gushing over ‘you know who’ to getting scolded for making too much noise in the library. From this to that, you became my best friend. Now what? Was all the fun times enough to make me love you so much to the point that I am dedicating a blog to you? Bleh, of course not. Ups...

On a Friday evening, I carried a huge black chair to my terrace ignoring how heavy it was. While I was panting and gasping for air while carrying that chair, I wondered why I was breaking a sweat by carrying a chair instead of partying and clubbing on a Friday night. Well, not much of a party girl I guess. I felt warm air hit my upper lips as I exhaled some air and took a long breath. Phew! Never thought carrying a damn chair would be so tiring. After I got over the fact that I really needed to start working out, I sat. I sat and stared. Stared at the clouds. The clouds that were so mesmerizing that it made me think. How does it feel to be appreciated by everyone? I mean, have you ever heard anyone say that clouds are unattractive? Have you ever seen anyone contort their face or frown or grimace while watching a sunset? Maybe not everyone gets mesmerized by clouds and the sky and sunsets but nobody scrunches their nose in disgust while staring at the sky either, do they? So I squin...